Whether you intend to plan a big bash or celebrate in another way, take in every detail of this special day which symbolizes the infinite possibilities the future holds for your graduate.
With my daughter’s graduation day looming, I can’t help but reminisce about my son’s big day almost two years ago. We were so excited. Our first born child was about to begin a new chapter in his life, and we were prepared to celebrate in style. The big party would take place at our home a few hours after the ceremony’s conclusion. We were extremely organized and prepared. We set up the backyard the day before, and we decided to cater the event to save time and to avoid unnecessary stress. After the ceremony, our proud family members and close friends packed into a half-dozen cars to head back home. I was chatting with my daughter’s godmother when she casually asked who brought my daughter. Panic quickly set in because I had no idea. Fifteen minutes later, we found an exasperated, sixteen-year-old waiting impatiently at the entrance to an almost empty parking lot. Even though I thought we had everything under control, the inevitable chaos of the occasion had caught up with us.
Whether you intend to plan a big bash or celebrate in another way, take in every detail of this special day which symbolizes the infinite possibilities the future holds for your graduate.
Party Time Tips
Parties can send the calmest of parents into a tailspin, so preparation is key.
- Timing: If your party will be on graduation day, it is probably best to plan several hours after the ceremony. You will have time to regroup or change your clothing.
- Options: Plan the party on a different weekend or host a “graduation eve” or “open house” get-together.
DON'T BREAK THE BANK
- Consider dual hosting. Share costs with another family.
- Print your own invitations.
- Skip the rentals. Borrow extra tables/chairs from neighbors.
- Borrow decorations from last year’s graduates.
- Bake cupcakes in lieu of ordering a cake. Decorate with tiny grad hats on toothpicks.
- Skip the DJ. Play party selections from an iPod hooked up to wireless speakers.
- Food: Unless you have relatives willing to prepare casseroles ahead of time, a catered event will ease the stress. Be sure to order at least a week in advance. Finger desserts served buffet style (in lieu of cutting a large cake) is a simple alternative. New trend: Party-size pizzas – simple and inexpensive.
- Service: Consider hiring one or two servers, so you can enjoy the celebration. Sometimes restaurants will provide servers at a reasonable cost for customers with large orders. Money saver: Young teens in your neighborhood might be willing to work for a “tip.”
- Party Photos: Photo booths provide instant fun and party favors (take-home snapshots) for your guests. Other options: Purchase a few instant cameras and leave them out on tables for guests to capture special moments. Solicit help from your younger kids who will likely enjoy taking random photos. Create a poster-size collage of the best party photos for your graduate's dorm room wall
- .Activities: Outdoor options might include volleyball, badminton, KanJam (a Frisbee game), your own miniature golf game, water balloon toss, or tug of war. If it rains, don’t fret. Plan activities that can be enjoyed indoors as well. Guess the teacher: Put teachers’ names on cards and tape them on graduates’ backs. Other guests offer clues until the graduates guess correctly. Jar of M&Ms: Ask graduates to guess the number of M&Ms in their school color/colors. Winner takes home the jar.
- In lieu of a Bash A party isn’t for everyone. Some folks plan a special activity or trip to commemorate the occasion. Think out of the box:• For girls: Day at the spa • For guys: Several tickets (he’ll want to bring friends) to his favorite sporting event • Road trip to the graduate’s place of birth• If available at your teen’s school, purchase a commemorative paver or plaque to be displayed for years to come
- Lose the Stress You want your teen to remember that you were all smiles on her graduation day, so be sure you address potential stress triggers. “Graduation day marks a major life passage,” says Jean Fitzpatrick, LP, a marriage and individual therapist based in New York City. “It’s natural for parents to feel the pang of knowing that their child is growing up and becoming more independent. Focus on staying in the moment and enjoying the day’s events together,” she suggests.
Jeffrey Guterman, PhD, a Florida-based licensed mental health counselor and author of the best-selling book Mastering the Art of Solution-Focused Counseling, Second Edition (American Counseling Association, 2013), points out, “If parents are excessively stressed, it can help to encourage them to tap into their own natural effective coping skills. I encourage parents to think about what has worked effectively for them in the past when dealing with stressful situations.”
If you plan well, accept help when it’s offered, and focus on your teen, graduation day will garner a lifetime of precious memories. Just don’t forget the Kleenex!
Myrna Beth Haskell is a freelance writer and monthly contributor to Rochester & Genesee Valley Parent Magazine who lives in Salt Point, NY. She is the author of LIONS and TIGERS and TEENS: Expert advice and support for the conscientious parent just like you (Unlimited Publishing LLC). Visit www.myrnahaskell.com.
